Things I'm Afraid To Tell You

Everything isn't as rosey as it seems in the world of blogging, and while we like to talk about our favorite designers and outfits, let's be honest: Life happens.

When I came across Make Under My Life's post, Things I'm Afraid To Tell You, I was thrilled. Finally, someone is stepping outside the fashion/decorating comfort zone and getting a little more real. Other bloggers have come forward and shared their fears and honest worries, and I think it's awesome that the lines of communication are opening up to show that we are all human.

I rarely divulge much about my personal life on my blog, but I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to do so... since we're all being honest. I'm a couple days late, but here goes...


- I have a weakness for cheese. At least once a week, I come home with a new block of it along with crackers. Obsessed is an understatement.


- I often feel left out of the fashion blogging world, and wish my blog was bigger than what it is. Having a blog where I can express myself has been a blessing. Where else can I climb on a soapbox and put my thoughts and opinions out there freely and openly? But there are times when I see other bloggers achieving success, and am a little jealous and discouraged. I tend to judge myself against their accomplishments, and view my own achievements as insignificant when I should be celebrating them. Since I started House Of Jeffers, each year I gain more knowledge, more friends and perhaps more life experience when it comes to the politics of blogging, and while I can be social, I'm probably not social enough. Writing has always been my biggest passion in life, and there are times when I feel like if someone would give me the chance to show what I can offer, I'd be able to accomplish more.

- I worry in advance to the point where it stresses me out.  I'm constantly thinking ahead to the future, and trying to take measures to avoid certain stresses in my life... which backfires and causes me more stress. I have to learn to mellow out and take things with a grain of salt.

- I'm catholic, but going to church makes me uncomfortable. I think I associate going to church with funerals more than places of worship. While I did get married in a church, and I practice religion on my own turns, church reminds me of those who've passed away. I don't go unless I have to... which means it's been a while.

- I've have road rage. Yes, I am that person who honks the horn and has given a not-so-friendly gesture to others. My bad.

- I'm not shy, but I tend to be when I meet new people, especially other bloggers. I think it's that initial "What do I say?" that gets the best of me. But once the conversation kicks off, I'm fine. But I do think this has prevented me from having more friendships in the blogging community.

- I'm afraid I'll need surgery for a cyst I had removed a couple years ago. I've NEVER spoken about this on my blog, and it's something that I struggled with for many years, but in 2009, I had surgery to remove a cyst near my tailbone which I had since I was 16. The recovery was rough and for a year, I didn't heal. Everyday, I had to bandage myself up because I was bleeding and I knew something wasn't right. After 6 months of not healing, I had a second surgery in 2010. I remember being in the operating room, as I was about to be put under and crying because I just wanted the whole ordeal to be over. I wanted to heal and go on with my life. I couldn't sit, driving was painful and sleeping was even worse. The second surgery caused the scar I already had to be even bigger...  and again, I wasn't healing. By this point, I had been to 3 specialists, wound care centers and my last resort was a plastic surgeon. I was told in October of 2010 that if I didn't heal soon, I'd have to have a third surgery, which was planned for January 2011. But by November, I saw signs of less pain and my scar healing. Luckily, it healed and I've been doing great since then. But I still fear that someday, it might return and I might have to go through it again. 

Bloggers Who've Also Shared The Things I'm Afraid To Tell You:

Cassie: Coco + Kelley / Christine: Court & Hudson / Caitlin: Sacramento Street / Roxy: My Cup of Te / Crystal: Blog / Meg: MIMI+MEG / Ashlina: The Decorista / Katie: Modern Eve / Erin: Apartment 34 / Erica: Design Blahg / Victoria: Vmac & Cheese / Christine: Miles to Style / Franki: Life in a Venti Cup  / Sue: The Zhush / Erika: Radiant Republic / Gabrielle: Savvy Home / Monika: The Doctor's Closet / Naomi: Design Manifest /Tobe: Because It's Awesome / Becca: {extra}ordinary wonders / Lynzy: Sparkling Footsteps / Hitha: Hitha On The Go / Sarah: Note To Self / Liz: So Much To Smile About / Sarah: Blogstar / Alissa: The Goods Design / Jessie: Style & Pepper / Erika: Small Shop Studio  / AV: Long Distance Loving / Maggie: Maggie Rose Blog / Nicole: The City Girl In Me / Priscilla: The Best Laid Plans / Jen: Concrete Jungle DC / Janelle: Food Fashion Fitness / Natalie: East Coast Chic