Plaid: The Unapologetic Fall Uniform

I've pretty much been wearing plaid every day. And I should probably find something other than plaid to wear since it's not like I don't have other clothes in my closet to wear.

Never been one to fully master layering, I figured if was going to put on another button-up shirt, maybe I should break it up somehow. Instead of a chunky knit sweater, I tried out this sleeveless peplum shirt from H&M, and there you have it - the outfit I wore to take Nathan and Landon to visit Santa! Yes, I already took the boys for their first Christmas photo with Santa about a week ago. And yes, I am that mom. No way was I going to brave doing this on Black Friday, or really, any weekend after that considering the mob scene the mall turns into. Moms out there know what I'm talking about - I've got potential diaper changes in the mall and a feeding schedule to contend with. Early it is.

And since we're getting all festive, I'll be rocking this perfect Kate Spade New York Southport Avenue Handbag that I got for my birthday! It's actually called the Jenny (not the reason I wanted it), and if I do say so myself - it fits my style personality. It's bold, and different, yet can become a classic wardrobe piece with extreme versatility. Since I opt for darker colors to incorporate into my wardrobe, I've found having a red handbag to be extremely inspiring in terms of finding new things to pair it with.

Hope you all enjoyed Thanksgiving, and better yet, took advantage of those killer Black Friday sales! Onto Cyber Monday! If you need me, I'll be stalking Instagram and cleaning out my email from the 200 emails an hour I'm getting because of it.

Details:

Tommy Hilfiger Plaid Shirt - c/o / Peplum Sleeveless Top - H&M / Jenny Bag - Kate Spade New York / Jeans - Urban Outfitters / Patent Leather Boots - Modcloth

Blue Hues

Going back to work has given me the chance to dust off all the clothes I couldn't wear while pregnant, and to rip the tags off new ones I bought when I literally couldn't see my feet.

But now that I have a view of what's beneath me, I'm back in my heels and feeling like I'm regaining my pre-pregnancy appearance. It's been 4 months, and for the most part I think I look pretty much the same. Okay... I'm just going to say it: I look like I didn't have two babies. And I know how lucky I am to have good genes in the sense that I was able to bounce back to my pre-baby size. But, I do have some work to do and while it may not be visible to everyone, I know what I want to achieve and that I'm not 100% there yet. It is a struggle to come to terms that your body really isn't your body anymore after you have a baby, let a lone two. Yet, what it all comes down to is any woman who has had a child would probably say they would sacrfice the appearance of their body for the sake of their children. And I'm no exception. 

Dresses have always been a staple for me, and especially for summer. Expanding my color palette, this blue geo print dress in blue is one of my current favs. I've worn it both casual and dressy, as is evident by the heels in today's #ootd. I wore this outfit on a Sunday for lunch in my town with the boys, and for some mommy time getting my hair blown out in the morning. Simple pleasures, people. I'll take free time when I can get it... but I don't mind sacrificing my personal me time for the boys. 

Unless we're shopping (just kidding!).

Outfits:

Dress - Forever 21 / Ankle Strap Metallic Heel Heels - Spring.com (shop a similar shoe style here) / Stitched Leather Camera Bag - Henri Bendel / Bracelets - Alex and Ani / Sunglasses / ZeroUV

#MomLife: Returning to Work is a Mother

Today, I became a working mom. It's a bittersweet day filled with a ton of emotions that I was not looking forward to facing. Until a couple of months ago, I was a pregnant mother-to-be only able to imagine what it felt like for millions of women who stepped into motherhood and returned to work a short time after their babies were born. Fast forward now, and the phrase "Hindsight is always 20/20" is very real.

For the last three months, I've been set in a routine of caring and bonding with the twins. Each day is different - some are adventure filled, some are lazy spent at home completely content in watching the boys in amazement, some are rough and long as one of the babies might be feeling not so well, some are filled with new developments as the boys discover something new... and some are just like any other day. The feelings of looking at your child and having more and more love in your heart for them with each passing day is something that can't ever truly be expressed in words. But as each day turns to night, the lingering reminder that my new routine would become old news pushed me one day closer to the end of my maternity leave.

I'll admit - I was dreading this day, and not for the reasons you might think. Unlike some moms out there, I happen to have a job I truly love. It's the best job I've ever had, actually. But, the idea of spending 12 hours a day, five days a week away from my sons makes me feel like I'm letting them down in a way. Will they feel like I wasn't there for them? Stories of children being resentful toward a parent who worked haunts me. Will the boys lose interest in me and love Daddy more than Mommy because he's home with them more now? I have already packed up 4 picture frames with their photos to turn my cubicle into a Landon and Nathan Mini Museum...

I keep telling myself that I'm not the first woman on the planet to face this day. And I know it will be harder on me than it will on them. But how do you get over knowing that you'll be missing out on many "firsts"? I'm going to lay one of my fears out there: I'm almost nervous to come home and hear that one of them did something new - and because of that, I'll be a little bit jealous of my husband (who will be taking care of them during the day) when he tells me about the cute thing Landon or Nathan did. Babies change so much in the first 3 months, and now with the boys approaching 4 months soon, I know they'll be changing faster than ever. It's inevitable that something monumental in the book of memories they're working on will happen. I just have to face it.

But that doesn't mean I'm prepared for it...

The debate on stay-at-home moms and working moms contributions to the family have been heavily debated, and I won't be another woman who pins one against the other. Both are equally important. And each family is different. The decision a family makes together or a mom decides on her own to return to work or stay home isn't for me to judge. And frankly, no one else should be doing that either. Unless you yourself are ready to take care of a someone's baby 24/7 and pay all of her family's bills, then you really don't have a right to lay societal stereotypes on her capabilities as a mother if she returns to work. I have respect for mothers, period. No matter if your throne is an office chair or a rocking chair - duty calls as the powerful keeper of your domain.

So, as quickly as a became a mom, I proudly take my new title and add a little something extra to it. The first week will surely be an adjustment for me, and I know in time, I'll get used to it. But for now, I'm working through the emotions, and minimal sleep, to write a new chapter in my book of life.

True and False: Parenting Perceptions

Three months into being a new mom, I'm discovering lots of unspoken truths that come with the territory. No matter what advice or nuggets of wisdom people give you, there are just some things that you discover firsthand. Although I'm caring for two babies, and babies seem to have a lot of shared routines and behaviors no matter the gender, I will say that taking care of newborn twins at once is completely different than tending to one.

Perception when it comes to parenting is a mere assumption of "how it is". And then there is truth - the way it really is but never really gets discussed because as a parent, you end up figuring out that all those parental perceptions you thought were one way, are not as they seem.

So, let's dive into these disillusions of parental truths, and expose them for what they really are, shall we?

1. Changing your baby in public

The perception: If you have to change your baby's diaper while out, it's simple: You just use the changing table in the women's restroom.

The truth: Maybe I'm paranoid, but there is no way in hell I'm putting my 3 month old sons on top of that changing table. To even call it a "changing area" is an insult to changing tables. It comes as no surprise that public restrooms are the places where germs and cretins convene and have germ orgies. And everyone who enters that restroom is leaving a little bit of their cooties behind.

Perfect place to lay down my kid, right?

I keep a foldable changing pad in my diaper bag, along with wipes and antibacterial lotion. One glance at the state of the stalls and toilet, let alone the changing table, and I wouldn't even put down my changing pad on a public restroom changing table... or put it back in my bag.

The reality: You end up changing your child in your car. I have a truck, so I can open the trunk and lay down one of the boys there.

2. Sleep deprivation is soooo funny.

The perception: Knowing in advance that you are going to be woken up at all hours of the night is a source of humor for people when preparing you for parenthood.

The truth: Sleep deprivation IS NO JOKE. Ask me how many times I laughed my ass off when someone mentioned all the restless nights I was in store for.

Um. Zero.

The reality is that you will be so tired, your head will be hitting the back of the chair as you feed your child. You'll cry just a little bit inside when you're running on 2 hours of sleep, and just when you nod off to sleep, you'll probably be woken up again in an hour. It's all in the name of love - I love my sons unconditionally and when they cry, I want to be the one to soothe and comfort them. But there have been days when I'm so tired, I worry that I won't have enough energy to get me to the rest of the night without a nap during the day. But on those days when we've had a rough night, the last thing I want to do is laugh about the sleep I'm not having.

3. People respect your privacy as a parent.

The perception: This really isn't a parenthood perception, but more of a human being perception. Strangers going about their business respect each other's privacy, and you in turn show the same courtesy.

The reality: People, especially women, assume because they had a baby, and so did you, that they can ask you really personal questions about your children and you because you have that in common.

I didn't think much of this at the time, but a woman, who was very polite and innocent enough, was asking me about the boys and my delivery. I obliged and answered her questions. But she asked me if I was breastfeeding or bottle feeding. I answered, then we carried on our conversation.

I thought about it later, and it made me think: This woman was asking me such a personal and intimate question. What made her feel she had a right to know? If a guy came up to me and asked, I probably would have been creeped out.

Does that mean I have the right to ask her about her sex life? Maybe I should have, actually.


4. There is no such a thing as stupid questions.

You've heard this phrase before. And while I've asked my fair share of stupid questions, I like to give people credit for using their own common sense when it comes to enquiring about my children.

But some people are not so gifted.

I have been asked a lot of stupid questions, and have heard some equally how should I put it - annoying observations from strangers about the boys.

The top of the list: "Are they twins?"

<Insert epic eyeroll here..>

I hate to sound ungrateful for the curiosity and attention the boys receive, which, 95% of the time is positive, but let's break this down: I'm pushing a double stroller, with two car seats on it, with two babies who are the same size, and while Nathan and Landon aren't identical twins... It's pretty safe to assume they are a.) brothers and b.) twins.

Looks a little something like this:

Obvious, right? I could understand if the boys were a different age and in appearance were visually bigger than the other. But they're not.

Another question I get is: "You must go through a lot of diapers?" or "Do you change their diapers a lot?"

Well, I do have two asses to wipe, and I don't let the boys sit in filthy diapers for hours. And, even though there are two of them, essentially they ARE babies, so yes, we breeze through diapers. Parents of singleton's have the same experience so I'm not sure why it's fascinating to wonder about shitty diapers, but people love to ask.

The joys of parenting are amazing! But nothing prepares you for your new role other than diving in, and not letting what other people tell you taint your vision of what it is. Personally, I try to take the words of warning I get and keep them in the back of my head as a friendly "head's up", but I don't let it mold my idea of what being a mom should be.

What are some of your parental perceptions that you've discovered aren't what you were told?

Let Life Happen

FACT: To say that my life has change in past 2 months would be a severe understatement. With Nathan and Landon being 10 weeks now, I am more nostalgic of the day they arrived. 

I have my sons to thank for all the new experiences I am becoming familiar with. Most of all, becoming a mom has opened my eyes to much more perspective. It's a completely new side of life that I always wondered about before I was pregnant. Finally, I get to experience motherhood, and being twice blessed with twins is something I am infinity grateful for. I really can't say it enough. I'm reminded of how fortunate I am to have them every day. It's all happening fast, and I wish I could slow down time to make the days last longer so they won't grow up so fast. People told me time was going to fly by once they were here, and they were right. The time I have with mu children is precious and is all theirs. 

Which is why my appearances on House Of Jeffers have been... limited. As you can imagine, my days are much different than they were pre-motherhood. Since being on maternity leave, going outside to take outfit photos is truly an ordeal as I plan everything around the twins. I owe them all of my attention and care, so stepping away to sit at the computer, when I could be watching them play or watching them smile in their sleep is where I should be. Every bathtime, every feeding, every diaper change, every cry - as their mother, I don't want to miss a thing. 

During it all, I think I've done a good job of retaining the parts of me that make me, me. I still keep my routines like maintaining the length of my bangs (even if I cut them myself more often). I make time at night to paint my nails. During feedings, I check Instagram or my Twitter feed to get in touch with society outside my little home. I keep my love for style going by committing to get dressed every morning in anything but sweats. I can happily report that pony tails and t-shirts have NOT become my Mommy Uniform. Dresses on the daily, actually. Although I might not have time to go shopping, I live vicariously through magazines to feed my shopping addiction. Besides, buying clothes for the boys is a lot more fun than doing it for myself. There's no way I can resist a smartass quote on a baby onesie... 

Each day is different. And challenging. Caring for two newborns at once is everything you think it is - tiring. But, the rewards of a hard day are seen in every moment where Nathan and Landon learn something new and develop their personalities. It's amazing. They're amazing. I love them more than I can explain...

But, one thing I think about, and miss, is blogging. Don't get me wrong - being a mom is beyond amazing and the best thing EVER. It gives me a sense of purpose that was missing in my life. But before my new role as a mom, blogging was my way of keeping myself busy. House Of Jeffers became my personal oasis of writing about personal style. 

I have my blog to thank for keeping my sanity in terms of creativity for many years. The fashion community is rich with women who are trailblazers and influencers that I can credit for inspiring me daily to produce content that I 100% stand by, and hopefully, my readers enjoy. Style is always evolving, and so is my own sense of it, and self. To fill the void of not working in the fashion industry and missing England, I created House Of Jeffers with the goal of encouraging people to be themselves - as original, odd, weird, unique, trendsetting or indifferent as they can be. And it hasn't always gotten me to where I'd like to be - and that's okay.

And if you're a blogger, you know the struggle is real.

From firsthand experience, I can say that me not following the crowd in the blogosphere hasn't always led me to the most popular of places, or put me in rank among more successful bloggers. To put it bluntly: I know my own sense of style - while not so "out there" or trendy or along the standards of what is considered stylish - hasn't put me front and center in front of brands and other bloggers. It hasn't given me 50, 000 followers on social media or dropped opportunities in my lap. It hasn't always led me to make friends with people who I thought were genuine people because  it turns out they viewed me as different or not on their level (and I'll save my stories experiencing snubs for a later time).

... My blog might not be the biggest and most popular. But it's mine. I've done it my way, and am proud to say that I didn't given in to conformities and standards of what others thought it should be. #sorrynotsorry

But I've changed, and will continue to do so. And I think it's time House Of Jeffers does, too. 

Style is still the single most important way to express my personality without opening up my mouth. But my new role as a mother has shed light on so many other things that relate to me now. There's other facets that I want to explore with my writing, and in turn, share with you. I don't hide the fact that I talk about my boys - a lot - ever since April. And I don't plan on stopping that at all. In fact, it's going to continue so much more, and expand into new territories and topics beyond outfit posts.

My plan is to feature more about my life, and create posts that speak to new mom, non-moms and everyone in between. Some posts will be personal, some will relate to children, some will explore content that relates to making life easier through shortcuts and tricks I've discovered. I don't know... more variety, really.

So, I ask you to please hang in there with me. As I get my footing as a new mom and a writer, be patient with me. House Of Jeffers IS NOT ENDING. It's expanding.

As always, I am so appreciative of all the support my readers and brands have shown me! Big love to all of you!

Until then, I'll be cleaning up spitup while sitting in my rocker thinking about what I want to share with you next on the blog.

Stay tuned - the best is yet to come!

Jen

Strolling through Spring

Landon and Nathan will be 1 month old. I really can't believe that a month has gone by and the boys are a month old. I don't know where the time went. I probably lost some of it during the hours I wake up in the middle of the night for feedings, the naps, the diaper changes and the moments I get to hold them and just enjoy their smiles and sleeps. Being a parent is exciting and a learning experience. While there are many times I find myself searching for a mommy answer in the non-existent baby manual, I think it is absolutely true that your maternal instincts kick in, and you just figure it out...

Another aspect I'm still getting used to is not having a pregnant belly. Sure, I miss carrying the boys, and now I truly get to carry them in a whole new way. But, I will admit it's nice to have my body back and to return to wearing my non-maternity clothes. I always felt like I dressed like "me" when I was pregnant, but after a while, I did miss my old clothes.

On our first walk around our neighborhood, I put on this flower print babydoll dress I bought at H&M while I was pregnant. It's comfortable enough to spend the day in with the boys, yet, it's really feminine and can be dressed up with heels or flats.

Luckily, the weather has been on my side, and I've been able to not only dress myself in my best spring attire, but give the boys' daily outfits some adorable baby flair, too!

Details:

Floral Print Babydoll Dress - H&M / Blue Aviator Sunglasses - Urban Outfitters / Pink Flats - Old Navy / Baby Jogger City Select Stroller

My Birth Story

Hi all! Well, I'm happy to report that the boys arrived safely! As you can imagine, I've been busy tending to the twins, which doesn't leave too much time for myself at the moment. But when I can catch a couple of minutes in between their snoozes, I'm trying to fit in the things that were part of my pre-mommy routine - like blogging.

I wanted to share the twins' birth story with you today as I just can't get over the fact that I carried around two children in my belly... and that they're finally here.

But it's amazing how your life can change in an instant.

For me, that day was April 20, 2015. 
My husband and I arrived at the hospital at 5:30 a.m. knowing that in a few hours, the life we shared for the last 5 years was going to change. I thought to myself, "I'm going to the hospital, and leaving with two little humans." Just amazing.

After checking in, the nurses hooked me up to monitors to hear the heartbeats of my two sons. I watched the numbers go up and down as my own heart rapidly. It was part nerves, part excitement, part fear... But in the best way. Nonetheless, I was completely scared to be wheeled into the operating room. My scheduled c-section was set for 7:30 a.m. Knowing that after carrying them to 38 weeks (which is considered full-term for twins) I was going to meet them made me nervous. I'd no longer have the bump I looked down at everyday. But, I had dreamed of what they'd look like. Would they cry when they were born? Would they be born with hair? I thought about the past months and wondered if I did as much as I could in order to bring two healthy boys into the world. Luckily, all my tests and ultrasounds were on target so at this point, I'd done all I could. 

Finally, I was wheeled into the operating room, and my husband was asked to change into scrubs. I had a planned c-section, and leading up to it, I'd done my research in anticipation to what to expect. A childbirth class also helped prep me, so I wasn't in the dark either. I guess you could say I was "prepared". 

Experiencing something like a c-section is probably the scariest thing I've endured. Knowing you are being operated on while awake, even though you can see what's going on, is without a doubt terrifying. I shook uncontrollably on the table as the room was very cold. First, they placed a shower cap on my head - bangs exposed. Then, oxygen at my nose. I received a spinal block, which is slightly different than an epidural in the sense that the needle wouldn't be inserted in my bag and left there - I'd receive the dosage and the needle would be removed. I'll admit it was comforting knowing I wouldn't have to lie down with a needle in my spine. I can't say I was overly scared about this part b/c honestly, there's a lot of hype around epidurals and how terrible they are. But, it really wasn't that bad. The anesthesiologist is so quick about it, and they do it all day long... The biggest trip is to feel your legs go warm and absolutely numb.

After the spinal, I laid down on the table, and the curtain was drawn over my chest. Mike joined me back in the OR and sat right at my head. I was still shaking due to the cold of the room, and the nerves, but he did an amazing job of keeping me focused as as calm as possible. He really has been my rock in so many ways - picking up the slack for me and making our home ready for the babies' arrival. No words could really do justice for all that he's done for me...

After the medication set in, the doctor started the procedure. I had read that you will feel "slight tugging and pressure". I can't say it was slight... Sorry. It's not the doctor's fault, it just comes with the procedure. But, with all the movement going on, I can say that I was getting a little freaked out. While I didn't feel a thing, the thought of what was happening was probably causing my nervous to jump off the charts. 

After a couple of minutes, the doctor said, "Okay, Jen, here comes Baby A."

At 8:27, Landon Phillip Jeffery was born at 5. lb, 11 oz. - crying! 

Immediately after at 8:28 a.m., Nathan Samuel Jeffery was born, weighing 5 lb. 12 oz. Following suit, he made his appearance just like his brother - crying and screaming. Best sound ever.

I started to cry and just couldn't believe that my sons were now finally here to be part of our world. I didn't get to see them immediately as the nurses rushed in and whisked them off to be cleaned and checked. After some time, a nurse brought the boys to me and I remember just looking at their faces in awe. Instant love. Unbelievable. 

Now, as I'm home, my recovery has been good with moments of some pain. It can be difficult to take care of the boys at times when I'm having pain, which can be frustrating because I want to be able to be at my best for them. Luckily, my family and husband have been a tremendous help and have been very patient with me. 

Becoming a mother has been scary, rewarding, amazing, a learning experience and beautiful. I had waited for so long to finally experience this moment and everything that I've endured, it was worth it. I now get the privilege of being their mother. I cherish every minute with them and love that each day, there lies an adventure with them - big or small. 

In the meantime, I've been busy as you can imagine, so blogging will have to wait for the moments when I can get to it. But I'll be checking in I hope weekly.

I'd like to thank everyone for the love and support on Instagram! If you'd like to see more photos of the boys, you'll find them on my House Of Jeffers account!